Monday, 3/11

BBC America looks to be reairing the modern Doctor Who series, two episodes a day (at 9 and at 10 am CST), starting today with Christopher Eccleston's (the Ninth Doctor) debut episode; the same episode that debuted Billie Piper's Rose Tyler.  It took a couple episodes to get going, and they don't all make it out of the park, but there are more good episodes than not-- and more than an average amount of great episodes (such as the eighth ep, "Father's Day" which airs Thursday at 10-- and was the episode that cemented the series as a personal favorite).

The Bachelor (ABC; 7 pm CST). Season Finale.


Tuesday, 3/12

Hell's Kitchen; Fox. 7 pm CST. Season Premiere.

The Taste (ABC; 8 pm CST). Season Finale.


Wednesday, 3/13

Jim Rome on Showtime; Showtime. 8 pm CST. Season Premiere.


Thursday, 3/14

Braxton Family Values; WEtv. 8 pm CST. Season Premiere.


Friday, 3/15

The Wizards Return: Alex vs. Alex; Disney Channel. 7 pm CST. Special.
The kids from The Wizards of Waverly Place travel to Italy to battle an evil version of Alex.
Hardcore fans weren't happy with how the series ended last year, so producers found a way to bring most of the cast back-- but have also promised a sad ending for one character after the criticism that no one really learned anything and that the life of a wizard isn't all silly tricks but is often dangerous because of dealing with Satanic rituals.

Yes, what I wrote above is all bullshit...

Banshee (Cinemax; 9 pm CST). Season Finale.


Saturday, 3/16

The Graham Norton Show (BBC America; 9 pm CST). Season Finale.


Sunday, 3/17

Girls (HBO; 8 pm CST). Season Finale.

What if one took the ST:ID trailer audio and put them in other trailers?

Two of my favorite "mashups": Star Trek: Into Darkness' trailer audio and use it with video clips from Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Khan and Toy Story 3.

The Dark Knight as a romantic comedy

Okay-- so Einstein didn't say that, I guess.
The point is: look up once in a while. Einstein would have wanted you to.

Television Premieres and Notables: March 4-10, 2012

Monday, 3/4

LA Shrinks; Bravo. 9 pm CST. Series Premiere.


Tuesday, 3/5

White Collar; USA. 9 pm CST. Season Finale.


Wednesday, 3/6

The Rachel Zoe Project; Bravo. 8 pm CST. Season Premiere.


Thursday, 3/7

James Brolin guest stars as Jeff's dad in a very special Thanksgiving episode of Community (NBC; 7 pm CST).  Okay, the "very special" part was from me: thanks to the morons at NBC for holding this show so long that we see the G.D. Thanksgiving episode in March...

Battleground: Rhino Wars; Animal Planet. 8 pm CST. Series Premiere.
Four Special Forces members are tasked to train the South African anti-poaching unit.

Delocated; adult swim. 11:30 pm CST. Series Finale.


Friday, 3/8

Fashion Star; NBC. 7 pm CST. 2nd Season Premiere.

Grimm; NBC. 8 pm CST. Mid-season Premiere.

Super-Mega-Ultra-Facepalm Montage

Television Premieres and Notables: February 25-March 3, 2012

Monday, 2/25

The Haney Project; Golf Channel. 8 pm CST. Season Premiere.
Haney schools Michael Phelps this season.

Burning Love; E!. 9 pm CST. Series Premiere.
This Bachelor parody started out on the web and made it to broadcast TV.  I've seen a couple of webisodes, and they were amusing enough (if not particularly funny)-- especially Ken Marino's dim-bulb fireman looking for love.


Tuesday, 2/26

Parade's End; HBO. 8 pm CST. Mini-series Premiere.
Benedict Cumberbatch stars in this five-part mini (that airs tonight, tomorrow, and Thursday) that follows a man who got through World War I just to continue his marriage with a snobby socialite-- even though he is in love with another woman...

Golden Boy; CBS. 9 pm CST. Series Premiere.
Walter Clark is the youngest NYC police commissioner in history, and this series features flashbacks about how he got there.
Hmmm.. a cop show on CBS. Good to seen the network branching out a little.
(Okay, snarkiness aside, it does costar Chi McBride, so it could be worth investing time into.)

Robot Combat League; Syfy. 9 pm CST. Series Premiere.
A real-life Real Steel-like show where people control humanoid robots that beat the crap out of each other. 
And, if that wasn't awesome enough, it's hosted by Chris Jericho, so you know this should be a winner.


Wednesday, 2/27

Comics writer/DC exec Geoff Johns wrote this episode featuring the return of Deadshot (who was last seen with an arrow sticking out of his eye, courtesy of Ollie last fall) on Arrow (The CW; 7 pm CST).

Boston's Finest; TNT. 8 pm CST. Series Premiere.
Producer Donnie Wahlberg brings us this show that looks at real Boston cops.

Psych; USA. 9 pm CST. 7th Season Premiere.


Thursday, 2/28

Anthony Bourdain voices an evil chef on Archer (FX; 9 pm CST).

Nathan for You; Comedy Central. 9:30 pm CST. Series Premiere.
Nathan Fielder hosts this business-makeover parody series.


Friday, 3/1

Portlandia (IFC; 9 pm CST).  Season Finale.


Sunday, 3/3

The Bible; History. 7 pm CST. Mini-series Premiere.
Mark Burnett and Roma Downey bring us this 10-part series based on stories from The Bible.
I was interested in first (just because I don't believe in it doesn't mean there aren't good stories or lessons within), but I have read some reviews saying it's pretty bad.

Red Widow; ABC. 8 pm CST. Series Premiere.
Radha Mitchell stars as a mother who's forced into the drug trade.

Vikings; History. 9 pm CST. Series Premiere.
History's first scripted series follows Ragnar Lothbrok, a farmer who craves adventure and fame.
(History already has three more seasons mapped-out if this first one does well enough.)

And I'm not going to give details on tonight's other premiere because Donald Trump can lick my balls.