Disaster Averted

I was on vacation for a week and came back to find out the DVR had some problems and needed to be replaced. So I lost everything: John in Cincinnati and Flight of the Conchords episodes and the premiere of Big Brother and Part 1 of the "Nature" episode of Moral Orel. I won't even go into the loss of the one Star Trek: Enterprise episode I don't have on tape and waited five months to rerecord (I was hoping to rig up something to get the DVR to record to the VCR).

Not the worst thing to happen in the world, but disappointing.

But there is a little bright spot as I could catch the missed Big Brother and Moral Orel episodes on the Internet. And while I was there, I found some cool Moral Orel video links on the [adult swim] website:


First is when Orel saves his urine because God hates waste, and has to tell Doughy "I'm not drinking lemonade."

Next is Clay teaching Orel what it means to be grown up.

And what happens when Orel realizes God in him.

Orel spreads the Gospel lesson of turning the other cheek

And one of my favorite lines of all time is what Orel says after Principal Fakey asks him if he knows what happens to little boys who masturbate.

Premieres and Notables, July 9-15, 2007

I'm on vacation until the middle of next week, so I thought I better post this early in case I don't get the chance to later.


Monday, 7/9

Spielberg on Spielberg; TCM. 7 pm CST. Special.
A documentary that allows Steven Spielberg to discuss his films. TCM is probably in the top five networks for such a doc, so check it out.

Hell Date; BET. 6:30 pm. Series premiere.
A fake dating show that sets unsuspecting singles up with actors who go out of their way to make for bad dates. Sounds classy.

Take the Cake; BET. 10 pm. Series premiere.
An interactive game show where viewers can win via phone, texting, or the internet.

Greek, ABC Family. 8 pm. Series Premiere.
A comedy looking at college fraternities.

The Bronx is Burning; ESPN. 9 pm. Mini-Series.
ESPN isn't known for its scripted programming, but the few times it attempts it, it usually gets it right. I've heard high-praise for this 8-part mini-series that focuses on the summer of 1977 when the Yankees pursued the Title while the Son of Sam killer was on the loose.


Tuesday, 7/10

Tru Calling; Sci Fi. 6 pm & 7 pm. Series Repeats.
One of the hidden gems of recent years was this show starring Eliza Dushku as a morgue attendant who can go back through time to try to avert the deaths of the corpses who speak to her. Toward the end of the first season, her opposite number turns up, and things really start picking up. Sci Fi is now airing its two seasons starting tonight. Highly recommended.

Singing Bee; NBC. 8:30 pm. Series Premiere.
Joey Fatone hosts this game show where people try to recall the lyrics of songs. Who wants to take bets that this lasts longer than six weeks?

Build it Bigger; Discovery. 9 pm. Series Premiere.
A look at how big things get assembled. The first ep shows us how a roller coaster gets put together.

Baldwin Hills; BET. 9 pm. Series Premiere.
Yet another look at privileged kids in the L.A. area. This time, though, it's through the eyes of African-American youth.

Eureka; SciFi. 8 pm. Season premiere.
The second season of this quirky show begins. As with many, I haven't watched it yet, but I have the whole series thus far on tape. I've only heard good things about it. Check it out.

Into Alaska With Jeff Corwin; Travel. 8 pm. Series Premiere.
I'm not an outdoorsy person, but it's undeniable that this state is majestic and beautiful. I hope I can see it before I die (or before Dubya gets his oil-soaked paws on it). Wildlife biologist and conservationist Jeff Corwin is the perfect host for this travel show.

And if anyone is still watching Pirate Master (my last ep was last week), it's moving to Tuesdays starting this week and airing at 9 pm now.


Wednesday, 7/11

TV Land Confidential; TV Land. 9 & 9:30 pm. Season premiere.
Season two begins with a look at TV oddballs and then takes a look at behind the scenes of favorite movies.

Cash Cab; Discovery. 9 pm. Season Premiere.
Season three of the game show in a taxi series.

Super Bikes!; Speed. 7 pm. Season Premiere.
I guess it's a show about motorbikes and the people who ride them.

Don't Forget the Lyrics!; FOX. 8:30. Series Premiere.
See what I wrote on Tuesday about Singing Bee yesterday and replace Joey Fatone with Wayne Brady. It really is the same concept. Leave it up to FOX and NBC to get into a pissing match over a crap concept (remember a few years back when they had competing boxing series' s?).


Thursday, 7/12

General Hospital: Night Shift; SoapNet. 10 pm. Series Premiere.
For the net's first original scripted series, they made a spin-off about what happens to the hospital when the mother series' docs go home. It's got Billy Dee Williams.

This is taking way too long. Here are the premieres, pellet-style:
Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares; BBC America. 7 pm. Season 3 premiere.
First 48; A&E. 8 pm. 5th Season premiere.
Kansas City Swat; A&E. 9 pm. Season 2 Premiere.
Fine Tuned; Speed. 8 pm. Series Prem. Auto makeovers.
Hard Shine; TLC. 9 pm. Series. Prem. Competition for job with hod-rod fabricator.


Friday, 7/13

Monk; USA. 8 pm. Season Premiere.
The sixth season opens with Sarah Silverman guest-starring as a fan of the OD PI.

Psych; USA. 9 pm. Season Premiere.
The second season of this show has guest-stars as well: Tim Curry and Gina Gershon.

A Model Life With Petra Nemcova; TLC. 9 pm. Series Premiere.
Just in case you were ever wondering what it takes to be a model and have missed the dozens of shows just like it that have aired the past few years.

And if you missed Jericho last season, CBS is airing Return to Jericho (7 pm), recapping the first 11 eps, before it begins repeating the back-half of the season (8 pm) the rest of the summer.


Saturday, 7/14

Simply Delicioso; Food Network. 10:30 am. Series premiere.
Ingrid Hoffmann shows us how to prepare Latino dishes. We had a Mexican-food party this past weekend at our house, and let me tell you, the food is AWESOME when prepared fresh. I think this show can open up a whole new world for me.


Sunday, 7/15

Side Order of Life; Lifetime. 7 pm. Series Premiere.
This dramedy follows a young photographer who questions her life (on the eve of her wedding) when her friend gets cancer. Jason Priestly (who hasn't had good luck with shows since 90210) also stars.

Scott Baio is 45... And Single; VH1. 9:30. Series Premiere.
VH1 is on my banned network lists (for airing such horse-crap shows), but this one I just couldn't go without mentioning. Apparently, Baio has been a serial bed-hopper, and now he wants to atone for his man-whore ways by apologizing to "all the girls he's loved before"-- and he brings the cameras along as he does it. I guess the Charles in Charge money has run out...

A Side Note to Celebrate Year 231

Hope everyone had a great 4th. I've spent the majority of my driving hours the past two months listening to Revolutionary War audio books, and I've learned a ton about what went on during the close of the Eighteenth Century.

We should keep in mind just how special this country is because many, many things could have gone the other way, and we could easily still be a colony of another nation. I really don't think people realize that fact anymore-- the revolution should have failed considering everything that was against those people. A (relatively) small group of men (and the women in their lives sacrificed in their own ways as well) went up against the greatest and most powerful nation that had ever existed up until that time and broke themselves away. For the first time in history, a colony successfully won its independence from its mother country without having a monarch take charge.

Even after the war was won, Europe figured we'd be back as a colony soon enough. It never happened, but it very easily could have. Some luck, some help (notably from France and The Netherlands), and the skill of a handful of men-- none of whom were "politicians" when they started-- who believed in what they had won and gave their entire beings to keeping it are all that kept this experiment from being a failure.

No matter what you think of our government now (I'm certainly not impressed), it's the country as well as the ideals that we need to remember are what makes us special.

I think we forget that, especially as we lose more and more people who were alive during the Forties (the last generation who really had to remember what we're about). Let's not forget anymore, and let's not let a major calamity be the reason we have to remember again.

EMMY Preview

TV Guide's Matt Roush commented on TheEnvelope.com's reporting of what could be the final ten for the best drama and best comedy categories.

I agree with Matt about 90% of the time, so I found the post interesting.

Check it out here.

Keanu's Sausage

ROBOT CHICKEN hi-jinks posted by Choule.

In Case You Can't Catch the Movie...

Check out this ROBOT CHICKEN clip (posted by sabinaelrod). Love the reaction by Optimus when he gets a prostate exam...

Premieres and Notables July 2-8, 2007

I see Creature Comforts is listed in TV Guide (obviously printed before it was cancelled), so I'll say "Boo, CBS! You suck!" just one more time-- especially after I watched the third and final episode a few nights ago. Pure genius. Catch it if it makes it to DVD.


Wednesday, 7/4

FOX burns off the last two episodes of Drive (7 & 8 pm CST) that were in the can.

And a Holiday tradition with basic cable: marathons!
Monk; USA. 22 hours of the show, beginning at 5 am.
Law & Order; TNT. 15 hours beginning at 7 am.
King of the Hill; FX. 12 hours at 11 am.
Married With Children; FX. 4 hours at 7 am.
The Twilight Zone; Sci Fi. 21 hours at 7 am.

And AMC and TMC are having patriotic-themed movies throughout the day.


Thursday, 7/5

Ultimate NASCAR; ESPN. 8 pm CST. Series Premiere.
I don't know anything about it. Maybe my friend, Brian, will put something on his blog since I'm a dick and just called him out on it: http://dahlyvh.blogspot.com/

Big Brother; CBS. 7 pm. Season Premiere.
I have a confession: this show is my guilty pleasure. I know: I extol the virtues of watching good TV, and I watch this show that no "TV-learned" person will say has any merit. But I like it. If it was on in the Fall, I probably wouldn't see it, but there's just so much crap in the summer, that I actually look forward to it. And who doesn't love The Chen-Bot?

Anyway, more stuff to come, but first, let's check out these videos:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=KDo7-4HbE80

http://youtube.com/watch?v=zkGsY4gVE2w


Friday, 7/6

Doctor Who; Sci Fi. 7 & 8:30 pm. Season Premiere.
The Doctor is back-- this time without fan-favorite sidekick Rose. But in the second episode, he gains a new partner, so he shouldn't be lonely for long.


Saturday, 7/7

Assume the Position 201 With Mr. Wuhl; HBO. 9 pm. Special
The sequel to Wuhl's profane, funny, and very informative special last year about American History that focuses on the effect pop culture has on it. Highly recommended.

Avenging Angel; Hallmark. 8 pm. Movie.
Normally I wouldn't add a made-for-TV movie unless it was the absolute highest caliber. But I like Kevin Sorbo, so I'm going to mention the Western movie he stars in as a preacher-turned-bounty hunter.


Sunday, 7/8

American Body Shop; Comedy Central. 9:30 pm. Series Premiere.
Yet another mock-reality show from this network which seems to just like throwing shit at a wall to see if it sticks. I used to check out every new series this network made, but they've had so many misses lately (aside from The Sarah Silverman Program), I'm gonna pass on this one.

Speedology; National Geographic. 8 pm. Series Premiere.
A look at things done quickly. The pilot looks at speed eaters and what it does to a body to shovel in hot dogs and chicken wings at the rate they do.

My Favorite Things-- EXTRAS and Trick Pens

One of my favorite scenes from EXTRAS (courtesy of ExtrasSEries2).

"It's like a Picadilly Circus in here."

Star Trek Cribs - The Director's Cut

G4TV's commerical is awesome... Simply awesome.

Hook, Line, and Sinker

alexlloyd69 posted this clip, featuring one of Tim's best pranks, where Gareth falls for it hook, line, and-- well, you know the rest...

Keith's Appraisal

Yet another U.K. OFFICE clip from vanillabuzz. Keith absolutely rules. And this clip also gives a great example of why Ricky Gervais is such a master of comedy: three simples words "Always the same."

Gareth Is On the Case

What if Gareth had become a cop instead of an Assistant (to the) Regional Manager? One shudders to imagine...

Gareth Explains His Manliness

Another great OFFICE (U.K.) bit; this time courtesy of vanillabuzz.

One word: clueless.

The Office - Stapler Banter

One of my favorite bits from the U.K. OFFICE courtesy of wdb81. "It's got YOUR name on it."

Elevator Guy from 'The Loop'

I couldn't find the bit about half a yardstick (still rules), but "theguyotc" posted this bit that includes the line "power against power".

ABC Longs To Be Hero, Too-- Rescues Show

First NBC renewed Friday Night Lights when it could have (by rights) let it go (props to The Peacock).

Then CBS brings Jericho back from the dead (nice move by The Eye).

ABC felt left out, so they, too, revived a show that was expected to be dead when it wasn't mentioned at upfronts. They elected to bring back According to Jim. They even did CBS one better by giving the show an eighteen episode commitment (Jericho just got seven).

Hmmm. You know, ABC, if you wanted to make a statement, you could have brought back Brothers and Sisters or SportsNight (Sorkin's not real busy now)...

My Favorite Things-- THE LOOP

I hope to do a little feature from time to time that just, simply, explains something I find just funny or helpful or whatever. No real rhyme or reason. Here's the first:



Last Sunday, I was watching The Loop (which has become one of my two favorite shows airing new episodes this summer), and one of the characters said one of the most crass, but funny things I've heard in a long time.



Our "hero", Sam, gets bugged by Derek about every episode. They nearly always meet in the elevator, and Derek gives Sam a hard time by bragging about his own sexual accomplishments using very unsubtle metaphors while they wait for the elevator to take them to the right floor. One from Sunday just stuck with me. I'm going to paraphrase here because after I laughed at the crass part, I missed some of the rest:



"Where was I last night? You could guess I was half a yardstick in some Brazilian model..."



"Half a yardstick..." Three words that say so much...

Rabid Wolverine

Well, I intended on doing some funny bits tonight, but as I flipped on the VCR that had recorded The 4400 last night, I saw that WWE Raw was doing a tribute show. And my heart sank. I stopped watching pro wrestling about 18 months ago, but I still feel an affinity and admiration for many of the performers-- a large number of whom unfortunately have short lifespans.

Monday, Chris Benoit and his wife and young son were found dead in their home.

It's pretty early to tell what exactly happened, but from what I gathered from doing a little research on the Web, police are looking at the scene as a double-murder/suicide. Autopsies are supposed to be performed Tuesday, but police have stated that guns were not involved and there was no indication of stabbing, either.

I'm sure in the next few weeks, the truth will be known and people will have various opinions on the events leading up to the deaths, but I wanted to take just a little time to honor the man dubbed "The Crippler" and "The Rabid Wolverine".

To watch the guy in a match was to see someone who gave it all-- all the time-- as well as to see one of the greatest technicians of the "sport", ever. I used to read a lot of backstage stuff, and I can't remember a single person who had anything bad to say about the guy. "Dependable", "amazing", "professional", "calm", "respect" were just a few of the words used to describe him by anyone who talked about him.

His character never really struck a chord in me; I never really rooted for him. But I respected him. To watch a match he was in was to watch a master do his thing.

Pro wrestling gets laughed at by society at large for being fake, but I followed it enough to know that even though things are predetermined and matches are usually planned-out, these guys still take risks with their bodies. Being a pro wrestler takes an unbelievable amount of dedication. It is not an easy life. Jumping off the top rope onto another person hurts. Getting smacked by chair would do serious damage to someone in the "real world", but it still has to hurt like Hell in the ring. These professionals know how to take a hit-- but they still get hit. I'm sure Benoit wouldn't disagree with me since he had to have neck surgery a few years back to repair the damage he had done to him in his career.

For pro wrestling to lose someone like Benoit is a terrible blow. It's hard to compare him to people in other fields, but losing Benoit is to wrestling like losing Pacino in acting or Scorsese in directing. "Sports Entertainment" lost one of its greatest workers of all time Monday.

I don't even watch it anymore, but I will miss him.

Premieres and Notables June 25- July 1, 2007

Finally... a light week.


Monday, 6/25

Arthur; PBS. 7:30 am CST (check local listings). Season Premiere.
The eleventh season begins.

Wayside; Nickelodeon. 11:30 am CST. Series Premiere.
An animated series, based on the Wayside School book series.

History Detectives; PBS. 8 pm (check local times). Season Premiere.
Season Five.

Semper Fi: One Marine's Journey; Showtime. 7:30. Documentary.
A gay Marine gets outed and loses his job.


Tuesday, 6/26

Shaq's Big Challenge; ABC. 8 pm. Series Premiere.
Shaquille O'Neal and a team of experts help six adolescents with their weight problems.


Thursday, 6/28

Burn Notice; USA. 9 pm. Series Premiere.
Bruce Campbell alert! He guest-stars in this series about a spy who is suddenly cut loose, and now he has to find his way in civilian life-- which he does by helping people with his unique skill set all while trying to figure out why he was let go from the spy game.

Hey Paula; Bravo. 9 pm. Series Premiere.
Another C-list celeb lets the cameras film her life. This time, Paula Abdul tries to convince us she's not on drugs.

The most abused show of the 2006-2007 season, Men in Trees, beings repeating at 9:01 on ABC. The show really hit its stride in the third episode, so sit through the pilot tonight and promise yourself you'll come back the next few Thursdays. It's worth it.

Another slow-starter ends its life tonight. Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip airs its last episode at 9:00 on NBC. I never found the problems others had with the show because the main characters shared my views. Sadly, that wasn't the case for most of America as the views were not as even-handed as they should have been at first (okay, Matt was downright condescending-- which fit the character but turned off viewers). The last run of episodes were well-done and balanced out the preachiness (like when Harriet gave an explanation on why Danny should pray to God while Danny explained why he was not comfortable with it-- it was a great scene where no one was right or wrong) or just plain had great moments like when Matt realized why he had to suggest to Danny to have Jordan make Danny the guardian of her child in the event of her death. It wasn't my favorite show, but I'll miss it.


Friday, 6/29

Degrassi: The Next Generation; The N. 7:00. Return
Kevin Smith's favorite show (okay, I know he's a fan-- and guest-starred as himself in a few eps--, but I shouldn't say "favorite") returns.

The Best Years; The N. 7:30. Series Premiere.
Best described as a college-aged Degrassi.


Sunday, 7/1

The Loop airs its last three episodes (FOX, 6:30, 7:30, & 8:30). It wasn't a fantastic show, but the actors were great and I laughed quite a bit. I'll terribly miss Philip Baker Hall's boss. Every time that guy was on screen, I laughed. At least one of the most promising young comedic actors, Bret Harrison, has already found a new gig starring in next season's Reaper.

Booooo, CBS!

After three whole airings, CBS pulled Creature Comforts from the schedule, to be replaced by more repeats of New Adventures of Old Christine (could'a been worse: Two and a Half Men).

So much for CBS trying something new. Some parts of the show worked better than others, but the scene where the two voices are smelling wine but the on-camera characters are dogs sniffing a butt was riotous (it's a lot more classy-- and funny-- than it sounds).

Boo, CBS. You do a solid for fans by bringing back Jericho (which said as much for your weak pilot season as it did that you listened to fans), but Pirate Master isn't burning up any ratings records, either.